Wednesday, September 9, 2009
It's been a long time since I've written you. I think that's because I met someone. For awhile he consumed a lot of my time making the memories of you become more and more faint. Recently you've come back into my thoughts. Why is that? I am happy seeing this guy. He makes me laugh again and I'm starting to be myself again. He's a good guy and I can see a future with him, but he's not you. I feel frustrated because I feel like he's falling into the category of all the males that I have taken care of. That's where you were different. That's why you always come back in my dreams. You're the only man that wanted to take care of me. This guy has potential but is in a selfish mindset right now....similar to how I was with you. I just don't know what to do...part of me has to admit that I am most definitely holding on for you. I know you don't want me though. Not like that. Friends, right? I wish it could be more. You make my heart race when I talk to you once every blue moon. Although confused I must be grateful for knowing what true love is. I love you.